This post is inspired by Sarah's latest post "Satan's Lies". Just want to let you know that you are not alone.
Voices
I lived my life by the voices in my head,
They have filled it with a lot of lead.
The voices tell me that the abuse was my fault,
This message was ingrained in my mind’s vault.
The voices tell me that things were not worth trying,
This lie I was always buying.
The voices told me that I am bad,
This has always made me truly sad.
The voices tell me that I do not deserve good things,
That is now why I have broken wings.
The voices tell me that I can’t do anything,
Therefore, I sat at home alone and did nothing.
The voices tell me that things will never get better,
Therefore, I let the sadness, anger and doubt fester.
The voices have always put me down,
That is why I walk around with a frown.
The voices tell me that I will never be good enough,
I am so tired of listening to that stuff.
The voices I have listened to for many years you see,
They have tricked me out of the person I thought I could be.
Now one voice tells me it is time to change the tape,
I am doing this now so from negativity I can escape.
I have let my negative thought patterns (and other things) rob me of the life I so richly deserve. My friend Kate always said to me it was time to "change the tapes". What she means is to start thinking positively about things and not let the "voices" take over and hinder me from living life and start seeing things in a different way.
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About Me
- Marie
- I am a recently published poet who is trying to change careers. The butterfly symbolizes change. I want to go from the caterpillar to butterfly; spread my wings and fly.
9 comments:
Hello,
Where did the voices come from?
Just like that?
I don't have voices but used to have some.
I think voices are normal and that it is normal they are so negative TO ME.
If they aren't negative to you do you have any idea how to change 'tapes'? I tried listening to face 'B' of some of the tapes I had.. both sides ('A' and 'B') where equally pleasing... (only i still wish i where innocent sometimes..)
It's like there is this HUGE part of music I wasn't aware of :( It KILLS me...
I tried NOT to listen to anything. I tried a lotta stuff.
Where did ur voices come from?
hi marie, your friend kate gave you some very wise advice. i think the more positive people we're around, and the more positive voices (people, t.v., radio, music, etc.) that we feed into our eargates really makes a difference in how we look at and deal with life in general.
happy birthday to you, even though it's not until the 18th. i will definitely wish you happy birthday on your special day. may your day be as special as you are.
Special K-The voices came from the misplaced guilt that I felt for things that were NOT my fault. Because of the misplaced guilt, I thought I was a bad person. I now realize that I am not.
Heiress Child-I am glad I am surronding myself with people who are a positive influence on me. I am also grateful that I have taken steps to eliminate certain negative people and influences from my life.
I wish you a very happy birthday. Please do something special for yourself.
Kate has some good advice. :-)
There are also therapies that can help "change the tape". I'm a big fan of the Dialectical Behavioral Therapy. You might wanna google it when you have some free time and see ya you think ;-)
Sending positive energy your way
Hi Marie,
You have listened to that "voice" long enough, and it made you suffer so much already. Just as what Sarah did, just tell that voice to go away and that you will no longer listen to what it will say.
Just as what your friend said, change the "tape" and listen to positive and pleasant ones. It will change your life for the better.
God bless you with God's wisdom and strength to see you through all adverse situations in life.
It's good to want to answer that voice and to hear a new one.
oo sadly i can relate to it 100%. Except I'm still on the changing tapes transition...Are you Bipolar too?? I never mastered to figure out how bipolars can change the tape in times of depression....
Sarah, yes, I am bi-polar too. I am struggling with the recurring negative thought patterns. Right now I am in a mixed state. The poem was written when I was on meds. I am currently off meds and it is a daily struggle to think positive. Most days however, I fail miserably.
Marie, thanks for guiding me to your site. Yes, I can so much relate to your words of poetry. I am not bi-polar but I am an incest survivor. Even though I am in a so much better place than I once was, there are still days when the old tapes are back playing in my head. I know they aren't true and they still continue to affect me sometimes.
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